What is Jurgen Klinsmann thinking heading into Sunday’s match against Germany? Nobody has any idea. So, we’ve made a few bold predictions, some stone-cold locks, that will come to pass at RFK Stadium.

1. The United States won’t get crushed

It’s not much of an exaggeration to say the Germans match against Ecuador was over from the opening whistle, with Lukas Podolski scoring just seconds into the match. The South Americans’ defense in the match was shambolic and both teams started sleepwalking through the Florida friendly after the second goal came just minutes later in the 4-2 win. The United States sleepwalked through its own 4-2 result with mistakes and a gap in quality against Belgium. Those results coupled with the Germans’ strength has led more than half of ASN readers to predict a decisive German win and a full 81% tipping the visitors to win. We know ASN readers are the smartest on the Interwebz, but the margin won’t be as bad as it could be. Whether it’s a flare of offense at the end from the Americans or German indifference after scoring one or two, it won’t be a huge blowout.

2. Lukas Podolski will score

I mean, did you see that guy? The whole ‘score after nine seconds’ thing was a fluke, but Podolski isn’t a flash in the pan. It seems the Arsenal striker (and rumored Borussia Dortmund target) comes out of nowhere and is suddenly galloping in on goal, one on one with the keeper. It’s assuredly more complicated than that, but he makes it look easy.

3. So will Jozy Altidore

The low point of the “Altidore affair” will be him failing to pull the trigger in Cleveland when he scores in RFK and goes on to score in multiple qualifiers. This bold prediction has been made before, but this is the time the on-again off-again prolific scorer puts it together with a U.S. badge on his heart.

4. One starter will miss the qualifiers

Klinsmann likes to goof around with the roster, a habit that’s enabled further by the injuries inflicting the Red, White, and Blue every camp. That could lead to Brad Evans at right back. It could mean Danny Williams starting. A forward starting, not performing, and getting shelved for the rest of the trip. Somebody who is in the starting XI that will be frantically retweeted after it’s officially announced won’t be in another one this month.

5. It’s going to be OK

Look. It’s easy to worry, and matches against a pair of the best European teams may or may not be the best preparation for qualifiers. This isn’t sunshine pumping, it’s a nod to the fact that Germany and Belgium are way better than any team in CONCACAF. They’re better than Jamaica, Panama, and Honduras. There’s definitely reason for concern, especially if Germany runs roughshod over the U.S., but the American team is still talented enough to beat the three foes it faces in the Hex. There was panic before the Costa Rica and Mexico matches. Things went fortuitously in that pair of matches, but all that panic was for nothing. The advice? Sink into your comfiest match-viewing location, crack into your favored beverage, and don’t fret if things go haywire Sunday.

There’s the locks, so place a quick call to your bookie! ASN will take a share of all profits and no responsibility for all horrendous losses.